Lately I’ve been more vocal about therapy and how much it has helped me and continues to help me. One of the things that my therapist is great at is asking me questions I never asked myself, and as a girl who does not find it strange to have one on one conversations with yourself, I ask me a lot of questions! LOL 


Anywho, a couple of weeks ago I was sharing some life updates with my therapist and some situations that occurred and she asked me to pause and take a moment to realize my growth. She pointed out the change she could physically see on me, the changes in my speech, and the change in my thought process. Y’all it didn’t hit me right then, but it hit me later while journaling the other night, just how much I have changed from who I was even a few months ago. Before my session ended she asked me this question: “What do you call this part of your life you’re in?” She instructed me to reflect on where I am, and where I’ve come from, and to give this moment a name. Doesn’t she ask great questions?!


Well, I’ve been pondering that question for a little while now and just yesterday I found the perfect name for where I am right now; Revision. 


I feel I am currently in a moment of revision in my life. When I think about revision I think about all those papers I’ve written over the years and all the revisions I’ve made to them and all the times my instructors asked us to do peer revisions. I took that job very seriously, because in my mind if a 100% is a possibility, than that’s what you aim for! So given the opportunity to help a classmate get an A+ I had to revise with precision. Fun fact: In upcoming sessions we will be walking through my perfectionism I deal with in therapy! Ha! 


Back to revising…I would read the whole paper first, then go section by section and make necessary changes to better help the flow and to ensure the task was met and complete. I would then re-read the paper to make sure I didn’t miss anything. I feel like that’s what I’m doing now. 


In therapy there is a lot of going back to help your life now and set you up for an even better life tomorrow. Y’all your girl has been putting in that hard work of checking what’s underneath all the bandages and seeing what wounds I’m healed from, which ones need to get some air on them, and which wounds are still very much open. 


When you make revisions on a project of any kind, you revise to get the project up to the intended standard. All this mental health work has been allowing me to see more of myself. More of the me I kept hidden and protected. The revisions are revealing what needs to go and what must stay. For example, I’ve gotten rid of needing the approval of others and I’m keeping my nerdy, quirky self! 


Before I go I want to share the definition of Revision with you, because this girl loves reading the dictionary!


Revision-To re-examine and make alterations, reconsider and amend something, especially in the light of further evidence or to reflect a changed situation, to make corrections, to improve one’s knowledge of a subject, to look again.


Right now I’m in the space of re-examining my life and making alterations and corrections. I’ve been reconsidering my past and amending the broken pieces, because God has been showing me evidence of His presence throughout my life and currently. All this self work has caused me to get to know myself again, and as I look again at who I am, I am discovering I like me, I love me, I support me, and I accept me. Loving this place of Revision. There is so much goodness ahead and I am so grateful that God is in control of it all!


Now, you may have wondered or maybe not until now, why did I choose the photo of the sign to go with this blog….Well I took that photo while on a girls trip with my sisters and it caused me to pause and I just soaked up that moment right there in the parking lot in the cold wind of Lancaster, PA. During this season of my life I’m just moving slow and stopping to soak up every moment, understanding that God’s timing is always perfect and to cherish our Now!


Love,
Vyse ❤️

Let me tell you! I have been making big changes to my hair care lately and it has been working! So of course I had to share with y’all! I’m going to tell you the big news up front: I wear hair grease in my hair! Did your eyebrows raise, did your jaw drop? If you’ve been a part of the curly natural hair community for a while you know hair grease is the forbidden fruit. We all grew up on it and when we got older, and became at home researchers and chemist and bandwagon jumpers we decided hair grease was out and hair milks, creams, and butters were in!


Well, a couple of months ago I was up late watching Youtube hair videos, which I find so relaxing, and just might have to make more myself… tehehe. I was watching a video by a hair chemist and she began talking about the benefits of using hair grease and the ingredients that help our over all hair health. I then started watching video after video of more people sharing how they started back using hair grease or use their own homemade version. I was convinced and started mixing up my own batch!


Y’all, I noticed an immediate change in my hair and have been hooked since! You see I have low porosity hair that cries out for moisture and all those cute lil fruity smelling products was not giving my hair the extra moisture its been craving, since I also now have a lot more silver hair. 


If you know me, you know I will cut my hair and shave it off in a second. I love a shaved head, that life is so freeing and the lowest hair maintenance ever! Recently though I’ve decided to let my hair grow longer and that I actually want to have really long hair. One day I was braiding my hair, and although people would see it and say it was long, I knew it wasn’t growing at a consistent and healthy normal rate for me. 


I realized I was dealing with a problem I know so many people deal with all the time when it comes to hair growth. My hair had no problem growing, its hair, it grows. The problem was, retaining the length my hair was growing. I then thought about my nails. (My brain works magically lol) I realized that my nails that used to grow really long, really fast, but would break so much, was no longer having that problem. 


What was causing my once easily broken nails to thrive, and why was my hair just staying around the same length? The answer to both was moisture! I wash my hands constantly, like a lot, like I put online how often I wash my hands once and people kept asking if I have OCD…a lot… With all my hand washing I noticed how damaging it was to my skin and nails and I started making sure to keep my hands moisturized with oils, butters, and lotion. Now all I needed to do was figure out how to help my dry hair stay hydrated and moisturized, so it could stay strong and keep its elasticity and not be easily broken off. I want to share with you some of the changes that have helped my hair stay moisturized and retain length. 

• Deep Conditioning - I deep condition my hair about once or twice a month. Its something about deep conditioning your hair that gives it that new hydrated life that all hair craves.

 

• Trimming - Everyone always says trimming is important for hair growth, because we need to rid the hair of splint ends. Only thing is, I’m a scissor happy person and I was doing too much trimming. A dusting here, and a dusting there, and another dusting done in a close time frame is just adding up to a straight up hair cut!

 

• Moisture - Hair grease is our friend. I also love using oils and shea butter in my hair. Find out your hair porosity and what products work well in your hair. Do a touch test daily on your hair, if its dry, moisturize! 

 

• Protective Styles - This is a big one! I used to think protective styles were only pinned up hair, braids, or twist. I’ve learned, for me, a protective style has my ends sealed and moisturized. I have seen my hair thrive with wash n go’s and twist outs. The gel I use for my wash n go’s, and the grease I use for my twist outs, have been keeping my ends healthy and allowing my hair to have length retention! Also, it is not a protective style if it is too tight on your scalp. Low manipulation styles that are pain free is the way to go. The moment I feel too much tension on my hair, I loosen the style so I don’t cause any damage or breakage while trying to actually protect my hair!

Love y’all, what are some hair tips you have?
Vyse❤️

I haven’t been posting on my blog for quite some time….ok a year! Well, even though I have not been posting, I still had some days I wrote. Here’s a blog I wrote back in March. The wild yet amazing thing is, it is so true and real for me now, and we talked about this topic in church today too! God sure does amaze me. He taught me a lesson months in advance only to remind me of it and show me just how sweet He is in getting His words to me. My heart is full.❤️


Remember Blog
3.1.23


I thought to make this blog a video, but knowing myself, it would be an hour+ long video, because what I have to tell you today, there is so much I want to say! I recently went to a woman’s retreat with 2 of my sisters and had the most amazing time with them. The Word was so rich and on time. Even though I much enjoyed the Word while there, it wasn’t until I came home I understood the heavy importance of the Word spoken. Isn’t it just like God to have you receive His Word, and then life comes and smacks you to see just how much of that Word you allowed to fall on fertile ground and mixed it with faith in your heart. 


Before I left for the retreat there was so much on my mind and my plate and I purposed in me that I would not give anything a single thought while on the trip. You do know what happens when you pull away to take a breather right? You may have stepped away, but always ready to receive you back, is all the stress and worries you left behind, because life does not pause just because you took a moment to pause yourself.


There is one lesson that was taught this past weekend that has been a constant song in my heart the moment I returned home. The lesson talked about how during The Feast of The Tabernacles the Israelites were to focus on remembering all that God had done for them, how He delivered them, and provided for them. They would spend a week resting from all their work and cares and rejoice all day, every day! We then learned that after this high time in the Lord, after all the candlelights went out indicating the end of the feast, people would right way become sad. 


I remember in our group discussion after the lesson I shared how we all do the same thing now. We’ll spend time thanking and rejoicing for all God has done, but then life happens and we forget our times of rejoicing, and our focus moves from God and onto our problems. As I write now I’m thinking…The Feast of Tabernacles was an instructed time of rejoicing, but when the candlelights went out, God our light, still remains and we can rejoice in Him everyday!


Here’s the truth: right now I could be a puddle in the corner curled up thinking on the things that have been occurring to myself and those I love, and the many things on my to-do list, but I’m choosing to rejoice in the fact that God is still good! God is still faithful, God is still providing, His grace is sufficient for us, and His mercies are still new every morning. 


The parallels of pain and peace, worry and rejoicing, and fear and love are happening in all our lives. What will you give focus to? Joy is not ignoring your circumstances, it’s remembering God during your circumstances.


I want us to live a joyful life. I want us to truly lay things down at God’s feet and refuse to carry what is not meant for us to carry. No matter what comes our way or makes it’s way onto our full plates, I want us to dance, because God’s light remains. I want us to sing songs, because God is so worthy of praise and worship. I want us to live with certitude that God is Lord, He is good, He sees us, He hears us, and God loves us. The other day I gave God my cares. I prayed and shared all the things on my heart and mind. My hopes and my fears. I placed my load down, and trust God enough to not engage in thoughts and words that cause me to pick those things back up. I highly recommend taking time to lay it all out before God and remember, we are to rejoice in the Lord always.


Vyse ❤️

I legit have a back log of blogs and reviews I want to post, and must make time to post! Be sure to catch that, “make time,” not “find time”. We must make time for the things that are important to us. When we try to find time to do those things we desire to do, something will always come up, and you’ll find yourself searching for more time!


Anywho…..this is a life update blog!


Back in April I received my Early Elementary Montessori Teaching Certification!! I’m cheesing about that, because man was that hard work! I realized the other day I just glossed over that accomplishment. I didn’t take a pause to recognize how far God brought me through. I was in the boys school room cleaning up and I saw all my Montessori school books on the bookshelf. I marveled at the fact that I read all those huge binders and stayed up many nights answering over a thousand questions and writing thousands of words all to become a better teacher for my children, and more children to come in the future. I remember how challenging it was and times I even considered quitting….but God! He gave me grace and strength everyday, and for that I am so grateful. 


Our Bishop back in NC who is like a mentor and Family to me and Thomas one day said someone told him, “Man you’re always in school”. I feel like I’m now that person who is always in school lol. I’m currently taking Spanish classes. Listen! I live in the United States, I live in FL, learning Spanish is essential in these streets! I told my friend, who is actually my Spanish teacher (the best teacher might I add tehehe), taking these classes with her are so special to me. I’ve been going to college and getting certifications for years and there were times I felt the pressure to go and get a degree and prove myself to others. Taking these Spanish classes is something I’m doing just for me. There’s no proving, there’s no assignment attached, there’s no pressure, its just something I’ve always wanted to do, and the fact that God blessed me with a friend who is willing to walk with me to teach me her first language, for that I am also, so grateful. 


Last year I desired so much for someone to start a Women’s Bible Study, and during my time of praying and hoping, God set me up and told me to do it, lol! I battled so long with the idea of starting a Women’s Bible Study, all I could think about was what negative things people may say, who am I to do such a thing, and honestly, what if I do it, and no one comes… Well, in December last year, while I was battling with the assignment, and my insecurities, my husband came to me one day and said the Lord said to start January. I knew it was God and I humbled myself, accepted my assignment, and started Light Time the first week in January! I love our Wednesday Nights. We laugh, we cry, we share, we encourage, we just have a great time, and for that I am so grateful.


So after I started doing the Women’s Bible Study, I was still attending a great church in FL online. After a while, I kept telling my husband I needed more. Online church can be great for so many reasons, but what I was in need of was community. My husband and I spent many nights in prayer about direction and community. Well, on the ride back home from a trip we started talking about all the things we desired in a church community and all the things we’ve experienced within a church community that we desired not to have. While discussing this, Holy Spirit swelled within me and the car. I began to cry as I thought about all the souls in need of love and knowledge of the Savior. I would hint to Hubby maybe we haven’t joined the church we were going to because we were supposed to start one. We’ve known for years the call to ministry, but assumed it was far far farrrrrrrrr away from right now. Fast forward several weeks after that car ride and the Lord tells us in prayer to begin. Time passes and the Lord tells me “Now is the time”……Time goes by again and during our monthly prayer ZOOM God speaks and lets me know when He said Now, He meant Right Now! Well, we fought it, we battled within ourselves, we tried to see how our agendas could fit into God’s plan…and in the end we surrendered and canceled all thoughts that were in the way of our obedience and began Hope Family Gathering, meeting Sundays at 11am! These last few weeks of gathering right at our dining room table have been the best weeks of the year to me! I look forward to Sunday and love talking about the Lord, our journeys, and engaging in edifying and encouraging conversations. Lord, for that I am so very grateful!


Now for one last personal inside scoop update lol… Ya girl just turned 32 and I’m loving this moment in my life! I’m walking in that New New! Forgiving myself, choosing happiness, and remaining hopeful. Every year, on our birthdays, my Mom always asks us, “Do you feel older”. This year, I do! Not the typical getting older random knee and back pain…but the I’m growing wiser in certain areas and the things that used to bother me, don’t bother me so much anymore. I spent years caring about a size, and now I care about being healthy and well. I spent years caring so much about what people thought of me, and now I know God accepts me and I accept myself. I spent years trying to be what I thought was required of me, and now I feel so free just being handcrafted by God, me! For all these things, I am so grateful.


Vyse ❤️

I have had the title of today’s blog written on my calendar for over a month! Been busy doing home renovation projects and getting my boys ready for their new school year. Oh, the boys have started their new school year and I have finally finalized their lesson plans for the year! Whew…Now I’m ready to get back on my neglected blog and share with you all many things I’ve been working on over the year. 


I’m not sure if I already told you all or not, but my word for the year is Release. I am not only looking forward to things being released to me, but things being released off of me. I’ve been focused the last few years on getting my mental health together. Putting in the work and time to truly allow my mind to be transformed and renewed. It will amaze you, the many things in our lives that are directly influenced by our mindsets. 


A month or so ago I was fasting with my Sis-In-Loves (How some saved folk say Sis-In-Law), and we were sharing our experiences during the fast. We all joked about how being on the fast removed all our go-to coping mechanisms. When our crutches were removed, we were then forced to rely on God instead, which we all agreed should have been our go-to in the first place!


Prior to being on the fast I did a healthy eating devotional with a friend from church. The author talked about comfort foods and the need for us to rely on God for comfort instead of sweets and snacks. I never thought I was one seeking food over God and that hit me hard! I knew I was an emotional eater, but it wasn’t until that moment I realized the times in my life I ran towards the short lived comfort of food, instead of the lasting comfort of my loving Father God. 


When you go on a fast you choose something you love to eat or enjoy doing that you feel takes up more room than it should in your life, and you choose to devote more time to Christ. The beginning is usually the hardest, as you realize just how much time and effort went into things other than the building of your faith and relationship with God. As time goes on, you have this grand moment, though sometimes just a minute of your time, when you come to grips that the things you used to run to, you don’t need to run to anymore; and you don’t want to run to anymore. 


Well, on our fast, three of the things I was fasting from was, sweets, long scroll time on social media, and television higher than a PG rating. I saw your face as you read that, and I think I even heard a chuckle, but listen, as the preachers like to say, “Stay with me. I’m going somewhere with this”. I actually started out fasting from many different foods, but after my body almost gave up the ghost twice from lack of nourishment, I realized I wasn’t meant to reach that level of holiness, and had to just cut out sweets. Use discernment when fasting!


I had reached the halfway mark on our fast and Holy Sprit seriously lead me to a thinking session, because I know I would not have willingly went there on my own.


One day I was sitting on my bed and some provoking thoughts came: Why do I run to sweets, socials, and tv so much? Why am I finding it so hard this season to turn away from them? What pull do they have on me? What am I seeking to get out of them, that I’m supposed to be getting from God? When did it start?


Soooo….you know I was sitting in my room messed up for a minute right?!


After some recalling and analyzing I realized I was seeking two things from the entertainment and food: Acceptance and Comfort…..Mind Blown… I know! I told you it had to be Holy Spirit, because it sure nuff wasn’t me!


I looked back over my life and I realized food became a comfort for me. I’ve experienced many dark days in my past, and many nights I would not go to sleep, but instead, would stay up eating and watching tv to numb my pain and to escape my feelings and environment. Food and Television became my comfort zones, a safe place of refuge. I’m starting to reach the real vulnerable place right now….


I began to see the need for comfort, then I wanted to examine the desire for acceptance. Ahhh to be accepted. It is a world wide desire. I had allowed myself to once again fall into the social media trap of wanting to be seen and heard. I see so many people online fall into that trap and then post videos of how they’re trying to come up out of depression, or how they stepped away for so long because it was too much. I thought about how I felt after scrolling so much. Although many posts I saw were entertaining, and many made me smile, after all the scrolling though, I came up empty. 


I would get up from my scrolling and realize how much time had passed and all I was doing was siting there watching other peoples life and compared mine to it. DO NOT COMPARE!


I confessed to my husband one day that I absolutely love and enjoy my life so much, and then I scroll and start to take out the good life measuring stick and think I have so far to go. I found myself wanting my life to look like others and wanting others to look at me and make me feel like I was worth something.


Ouch….this is getting way too personal, too real, too fast!


On a real tip, I was still holding so much hurt from people who literally made me feel like I was nothing, that any double tap or comment that was positive I so badly wanted, because I allowed those things to make me feel as if I was being seen, and that for a moment, someone thought I was worth the time.


Let me stop right there and say, that day in my room, Holy Spirit lead me to this truth: Get your Acceptance and Comfort from God! He will not fail you! I thought about all the mean folk I experienced and how they made me feel, then I thought about how God made me feel. I thought about all the people I wanted to impress and I wanted to accept me, and I realized I’m accepted by The King Jesus! I thought about the sweets and countless hours of comedy I ingested that never filled me, but in the presence of God my cup would run over. 


If you’ve found yourself seeking to feel acceptance and comfort from anything other than The Lord, today decide to replace those empty moments with Him. He accepts you just as you are, and He thinks the world of you. God will comfort you like no other. I may be a work in progress, but I’m glad to say I’m making progress.




Vyse ❤️

Before Christmas my kids kept seeing so many toy commercials that would interrupt their cartoons and work hard to grab their attention. Sometimes they would see a cool toy and yell, “Mommy come here, come here before you miss it!” They would then tell me how the toy on screen was one they don’t have, and how they believed somehow their life would benefit greatly, if said toy were to somehow magically appear in our home. Out of all the toy commercials they saw, the commercial they all were most excited about was a commercial for Snackeez! 

My kids are currently 3, 5, and 7, and they were hyped about a cup! My middle son who loves to explain everything, kept telling us how convenient the Snackeez would be, and how it would add to our lives to be able to sip and snack out of the same device. Fast forward, Christmas Day……They received their Snackeez! The look on their faces and the excitement in their screams made that one small purchase worth it. That little thing meant so much to my kids, and to see how happy it made them, meant so much to me.

The other day my husband had to return to the office for work. A few days before he had to go, he told me about it, and he looked so worried to tell me; because he knew of my previous reactions to news about him having to go anywhere during Covid that was not the grocery store! My reaction this time…..was no different. Mama was not happy! I may have said some words about people I had to repent for later…just saying. The night before hubby had to go into the office, he found out the decision was finalized and he sure nuff had to go. I was still having a rough time with it. My mind was racing and so filled with what ifs and whys.

Well, that morning came and hubby got all dressed up for work and packed his work bag and was headed out the door. The kids were surprisingly still asleep and now I was in my kitchen, early morning, in a completely silent home. The night before, I cried out to God and asked Him one simple request, “No matter what must happen, please give me peace and be with me”. As I stood in my kitchen looking out the window at the beautiful morning sky, and the way the leaves on the trees perfectly seemed to be waving to a rhythm, I felt complete peace. It was peace that felt so good, all I could do was start smiling. 
My smiles ended up shifting to my hands raised and tears rolling down my face. I became so over joyed that a moment I thought would be so hard, God had given me peace to make it through. He had answered my prayer from the night before. My prayer wasn’t long or eloquent, in fact, I was struggling to pray, because I was experiencing so many emotions. What little strength I had left, I decided to be straight up with God, and tell Him, I need help.

After I gave God praise, I decided to go and pray to give Him more thanks. While sitting there I realized that it’s the little things God does that makes the biggest impact on my heart. I have countless stories of how something seemingly so small in the grand scheme of things, could mean so much to me; and the fact that God shows that the little things I care about, He cares about; means the world to me!
I used to work at a community college in the admissions office back in NC. I had been out of work for a little while and was so grateful for the opportunity. Prior to getting the job, I would always start my days and end my days in our upstairs prayer closet. I was a homemaker with nothing but time in the morning. Once I got the job, my morning routine had to change. God had been so good to me and I decided one night that no matter how much or how little time I had in the morning before work, I would go up those steps, get on my knees, and pray. 

Some mornings I would be running late, and as I would get ready to open the garage door in a rush to get to the car, I would hear that still small voice say, “No matter how much, or how little”. I had many 2 minute prayer days, but every time, every single time, God would show up. I would feel His peace, and He would redeem the time. I promise you, I would go to pray knowing I had 5min to get to work, and somehow, I would make it right on time, or my boss wouldn’t be there so I could slide in lol. I couldn’t understand how it could be 7:30am, and after I kneeled in prayer for a while, it would be 7:32am when I arrived at work!

I said all that to say, it’s the little things. The little decision I made to give God time no matter how much or how little, He honored it. He moved on my behalf. He has shown me, that the little things is where He moves greatly. The little moments with my children, I feel His love. The little circumstances that pop up, He’ll be right there to see me through. It is the little steps I take trying, just trying, and He’ll make big moves just for little ol’ me. Today I feel so blessed for every little moment in time where God paused life around me to make me know He is near. Today, think back on a moment that was seemingly small, that had a beautifully grand impact on your heart, and simply tell God: Thank you, Thank you Lord for the little things.

Vyse ❤️