Our life is not in snapshots and short videos. I started taking social media breaks years ago after I noticed how much time I spent on my phone. The first few days I got to see just how much I used my phone, because I would be out with my family and would be reaching to take a pic of every moment. I would say, “Oh this is a post”. We went for a walk downtown and I wanted to show the “world” the beautiful view, then it hit me: Why don’t I just enjoy this view with my family?
I began my Instagram and Twitter this year saying I had a love hate relationship with Social Media. I love that it is a way to connect with family, friends, and new people. You can share the love of God with millions across the globe. You can see news, fashion, comedy, and simply cute chunky babies with little curly fros that will make your day better! I hate, or better yet, strongly dislike, because I come from a generation where saying, “I hate” is a bad word/phrase. I strongly dislike the way Social Media allows people to say horrible things about others in mass numbers. I strongly dislike the way it makes so many women and men fall into the comparison trap. I strongly dislike how so many people are willing to put their life at risk for the ultimate selfie. I strongly dislike how Social Media keeps children from actually being social! Most of all, I strongly dislike what Social Media does to many peoples mental health state.
Over the last few years I have seen so many stories of children committing suicide because of online bullying. I have watched so many YouTube videos of people having to quit their online presence because they entered into a state of anxiety and depression. I have also seen so many people be one way online, and another way in real life. This online social life has become full of social eyes, believing social lies! See what I did there…I get deep sometimes…ha
Now you know I’m all about raw honesty, so here is my raw moment: I have to constantly be mindful of myself, because I do deal with depression and anxiety, and cannot afford to allow myself to fall into the comparison trap; and lately I have started tipping around that trap. In my life I have dealt with the need of acceptance. When you’ve been so different for so long, you want people to accept your difference and love it. I’ve always been Shervyse, she’s the only person I know how to be, and the only person I wanna be, and I will not change who I am, and how I am, to fit a “like everybody else mold”. So when you have a person who is different, and not willing to conform; who desires to be in an industry full of conformers....girlllll….issuuueeessss!
Ok, that’s enough vulnerability for today! I got stuff to do and I can’t sit here and have a therapy breakthrough….just yet.
A few days ago I found myself getting ready. Sounds normal right? Y’all, I was getting ready for a selfie! Not getting ready for my day, not getting ready for some outing, just thinking about how I wanted to look for my selfie! Holy Spirit straight snatched me by my under an inch long curls and told me to pause. He reminded me that what I was doing, was exactly what I told myself I would not do. You see, I’ve done social media before, I’ve had a site, I had multiple socials, and I’ve had some success in being reposted and all that jazz. I hit a turning point in this social life, that many influencers hit, I had to step back and remember why I started.
It’s so easy to get caught up in attention. I’m such a girl of science and I know how to hit trends, market, brand, and be noticed. I know what posts will return a good viewing. I know what will gain me more followers, and you know what, I refuse to do it!
I came back to social media, because I wanted to fulfill my childhood dream of helping people. I love encouraging people and making them smile and laugh. I know that by being online I can reach more people than I can reach on foot (Or other modern transportation lol). I also saw how much negativity is online and wanted to be that authentic, positive light in someone’s life who needed it. I found myself focused on getting the numbers up, and I have to turn back to why I began!
You know the funny thing? When I started my social presence back up, it took me forever to find a recent picture of myself. When you’re not on social media, you don’t take selfies! Anywho, so where do I go from here?
I will focus on spreading love, light, laughter, and most importantly, The Lord! I’m gonna share with the world this love I have found in Jesus, that is incomparable. You see, for a girl who constantly wanted to feel accepted, I am accepted by God. I didn’t have to do anything. I was just me, and I just came to Jesus. I told y’all I’m a girl of science. I told God, prove to me I can trust you, and I will. He has proven who He is to me, my whole life, and I still trust Him.
If you find yourself comparing who you are, how you are, how you live, and the relationships you have to those online, just stop! I tell myself daily, what God has for me, is for me. I want you to know that to be true. Know that what God has for you, is for you, and is coming to you! Whether being an online influencer is your job, or you have a company that needs online views, or you're simply someone who enjoys sharing pics and videos, never compare; and always stay true to you, because the right people will come, at the right time! You’re freakin amazing, and walk tall knowing that!